It’s been awhile since I’ve posted a TSW update. I apologize.
December 25th was my 23 month mark and my life has been upside down. I’ve lost track of the days. Staring at the calendar, I can’t believe it’s January 14th already.
So, I wanted to post an update before my actual 2 year mark on January 25th. How can that be? 2 years. So much can happen in that time.
Anxiety has been playing a lot on my skin. And sugar. I started eating a lot of ice-cream and candy. I turned to comfort foods and I’m trying to break myself of that habit.
Before Dec. 25th, here is a picture of my skin on a night of intense anxiety.
My face has always been a huge problem area. My upper lip, cheeks, eyes, middle of my eyebrows, and spots on my forehead. It sucks having your face as your steady area of issues. I will be so excited when all of this is over.
This is a picture of me while in Boston, around Dec. 20th.
Once I came home the 24th, my skin was not doing well with anxiety, but real anxiety hit about a week ago. I think my body just reacted poorly. Also, around this time last year I had a massive flare. However, I do think it was because I picked up a bacterial infection.
You’re more than welcome to click on the pictures to enlarge them. My face started getting a bit weepy about 5 days ago. I just kept scratching and scratching since it was so itchy. I finally just wrapped up and then let it dry out. My skin felt like plastic on my face and then started to get flaky and peel. I’ve left it alone for about 3 days now. Tomorrow I’m going to need to moisturize again because I have things I have to get taken care of. I hate the tight, dry feeling but I’m trying to do what I feel my skin needs. My lips are cracking and sting, but I put a little moisture on them throughout the day.
Emotionally though it can just really get you down. I’ve been dealing with a lot personally so that doesn’t help much either. But TSW, on it’s own, slowly but surely depletes people of their confidence and stamina. Imagine having a cold. It’s super bad for 6 months, unbearable, no one can help you. Then it slowly starts to let up and your able to breath a bit easier and go out and do a few fun things. Then a month later, it hits you again BAM and you are down for the count. That’s when the mental pain starts to outweigh the physical pain. It plays with your mind. The up and down. The “here ya go, a little happiness” to “just kidding, sit down”. We begin to live in fear of what will affect us. We want to go out and have a good time but worry that something we do is going to spiral us back into the bad days. Mental exhaustion is bound to happen.
And, I know it’s easier said than done, but try and focus on the blessings you still have. My family has been such a huge support. My cousin brought me Chipotle dinner two days ago and my dad made a Publix run for me yesterday night. Not everyone has that and I am immensely grateful for it. It doesn’t take the emotional stress and pain away, but those types of gestures give me a bit of fuel to keep pressing on.
That’s what we need to keep doing, pressing on. And if you’d like, follow my other blog:
This is for my documentary endeavor to spread awareness about this condition. I am accepting donations and am also looking for sponsors. I am backed by a non-profit (501c3) company, so any donations or contributions are a tax write off.
I am also starting a web series soon. I will be talking with 6 different doctors about alternative methods of dealing with our skin problems without hopping onto steroids/ how our body works so we can better understand why our skin is inflamed and irritated.
Lots of love to you all. Thank you for your support. Keep going warriors. I believe in you.
Love, B. R. Wren