Something happened this weekend that crushed me. It opened a very recent wound and made me question just how cruel the universe can be. Or maybe it had nothing to do with the universe and everything to do with my consistent affinity towards metaphors found in our everyday lives; my life’s sardonic allegory. I have taken up… Continue reading Digging Up The Past
It is official. I am now a first wife. I don’t like the word ex-wife nor the word ex-husband, really. Both sound so harsh, like getting sliced in a guillotine. My head is still intact. My heart is debatable. I am too young to be a first wife. Just writing the word ex is unsettling. The divorce… Continue reading First Wives Club
I’ve had a lot of people tell me to see this upcoming week as closure. I really don’t. I have my divorce hearing on Friday, March 3rd, and I could not be more petrified. I feel like I’m walking the green mile to the electric chair where my body will melt from the inside out… Continue reading Less than 7 Days
Lately, I have been taking bike rides. At first they were just in the neighborhood. I didn’t really have a destination or purpose except to listen to the music in my headphones and peddle faster than my problems in hopes I could leave them behind for those 20 minutes. Then came the day I ventured… Continue reading The Castle On The Hill
It’s been 3 weeks since I have heard the sound of your voice. I am torn. I stay away as preservation. I wish for nothing but to speak to you, yet the second I hear a word from your lips, I fear I will lose resolve and fall weak at the knees. Sometimes, we have to do what… Continue reading Preservation
Having a pretty down day with my health condition. It’s the point where if I was called into work, I wouldn’t be able to go. It’s these times, when you feel like you can’t even look in the mirror or else your chest will explode, is when I miss him most. The going it alone… Continue reading Not There
Woke up today feeling like I hadn’t even slept. My health condition is flaring because I am stressed and all I can think about is him. Some days are a bit easier to get through than others. Today isn’t one of them. Women are complicated beings And yet not complicated at all When our hearts… Continue reading Missing Piece
When we are first broken up with or cheated on, most of us are devastated. Then, there is this phase where, out of desperate need for attention, we think that sleeping around will somehow numb the pain. If our ex is doing it already, why can’t we? Yes, physical touch is wonderful, but sex isn’t… Continue reading The Slutty Urge
I had to do something today that I never thought I would have to do. And I cried because I could’t hold it in. It’s these moments in life where you are staring into space wondering how did things get so out of order? Why are they so bad? How did happiness ferment into such bitter heartbreak? This… Continue reading Your Timeline
So, I’m doing this for myself. But I do hope that it helps others who are going through the same pain. As I try to refocus my life and move forward, these little entries throughout January will be purges of the heart. A release from my chest. We will make it through. When we are… Continue reading The Thing Is
